Why are you IN a movie, but you are ON TV?
Why can't women put on mascara with their mouths closed?
Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their rear end when they ask where the bathroom is?
Why do they call it a TV set when you only have one?
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a haemorrhoid when it's in your rear end?
Why do they lock petrol station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?
Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
Why do “tug” boats push their barges?
Why do they choose from just two people for President and fifty for Miss America?
Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase?
Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?
Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?
Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control when you know the batteries are dead?
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
Why does “fat chance” and “slim chance” mean the same thing?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
Why does “monosyllable” have five syllables in it?
Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant? I'm halfway through my fish burger and I realize, “Oh my God - I could be eating a slow learner.”
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
Why does the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
Why did you just try singing those two songs?
Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin?
Why does your OB-GYN (Obstetrician-Gynaecologist) leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
Why don't you ever see the headline “Psychic Wins Lottery!”?
Why is a boxing ring square?
Why is “abbreviated” such a long word?
Why is “bra” singular and “panties” plural?
Why is it called “after dark” when it really is “after light”?
Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips after you use it?
Why is it necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
Why is it rain drops, but snow falls?
Why is it that no matter what colour of bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
Why is it that our children can't read a Bible in school, but they can in prison?
Why is it that people say they “slept like a baby” when babies wake up like every two hours?
Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
Why is “phonics” not spelled the way it sounds?
Why is the third hand on a watch called a second hand?
Why is what doctors do called “practice”?
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
And why do people walk up to the lift your standing in front of and press the bloody button??..Do they think you had not thought of doing it
PrincessFiona
Ask them what time they got up or whatever, and they will glance at the clock when answering...
I ALWAYS press the remote harder to squeeze the last drop of energy out of it! 
women have to have the mouth open while applying mascara because its a sign of extreme concentration